...

Ok, I'm feeling a little crazy lately.
I was out for lunch in SoHo today around
1ish, and I nearly fell over cuz I thought I saw
you.  This is sooo not cool, dude.
Why do ya keep hanging around me?
I mean I really don't mind! I never did, but
I'm feelin just a little overwhelmed right now,
ya know, with you being gone and all the dreams,
and thoughts, and just feeling you around me, alot.
For my sanity,
I hope you're driving everyone else just as crazy!
Cuz this is just crazy! 

Maybe I just miss you too much!
You're my oldest friend, my closest friend.  And you were
such a big part of my life for a long while, and then after that
you stayed constant.  And I guess now thinking about it, this is
all normal.  I just miss someone who was and is very important to me.
James Shawn Agostini, I would never in a million years thought I would
have to face forever with you. 
Ok...now that I'm rationalizing everything out loud, it doesn't sound too. bad.
Then I think what would I tell someone else in my shoes???

I would say...
That this is normal.
That you are going through one of the most difficult times in your life.
I would say that death is never easy to deal with,
especially when it is unexpected.
I would say that all your fears, all your feelings are the layers of the relationship
that you shared.
I would say that it is ok to cry.
Crying is just making room for healing, understanding, and acceptance.
I would say take your time and don't rush this time.
Because these feelings will the strongest and the freshest right now.
Hold onto the great memories and make a place for them because you'll need them 
again to remind you, and keep you close to them....
So feel this all, take it all in...
In the end you'll be fine!

~Kamela