I’m really trying my best to hold it together.
I have so much rage in my heart that I have no idea what to do.
James you are amazing seriously,
when times got rough you laughed about it
You will get angry but after you released the anger verbally you were back to normal
This is outrageous, or maybe I’m over reacting
I know I can be dramatic at times I have my moments,
I guess this week isn’t a good week for me at all.
I’m having a rough time with life period at the moment
Hmm I can hear you saying “FUCK THAT, FUCK EM , Don’t trust no one”
You were on my mind heavy this week I wish you were here,
Erin has been looking cute all this week
She’s trying to make her butt look bigger so she has been wearing seven jeans all week I know you would have had soooo many jokes
“Grenada has Style” LAMO
After reading Kamela Posts made me realize
I need to be a little more humble
Her post are sooo quiet, smooth and at times humble.
Shit, my last two post were loud, angry and confused.
I’m humble on the outside,
but inside I’m screaming
Man I miss you!
**Manta**
1 comment:
i feel like you are where i was at 3 weeks ago. yelling screaming carrying on just really fucking angry. i felt selfish for being angry - like, look at jenny, calm, retrained, and i was a freaking lunatic so mad. i was mad at him, at james, like HOW DARE HE. as if he had any control of it. and i felt redick for even thinking it feeling it or saying it or writing it, but i knew that i need to FEEL IT because its part of grieving, and acceptance and the rest of it, i guess.
any way -= forget how kamela writes or i write or how erin writes or how many people read and dont write.
JUST FEEL IT AND DO YOU SAMANTHA.
we love you just the way you are.
let it out, seriously, or its going to eat you alive.
i love you, because he loved you.
you arent alone.
xx zaida xx
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